[ first day of school... pass the tissues! ]

sooooooo... today my boys, oscar 4 & flynn 3, started pre-school at our local elementary school.

for a long time now i've been dreaming about the two & a half hours i will be getting to myself...

yes you read right ~ two & a half hours... cue hawaii five-o theme.

we'd picked out back packs, lunch boxes & got name labels printed. but as the time got nearer my heart got heavier.

i started welling up at the orientation for heavens sake!!

the school is a 5 minute walk, so we pile out of the house each with a back pack, 10 seconds later i'm carrying 3! (i knew i should have got the ones with wheels!!)

my boys run ahead & i watch with great pride, my little men, happy & bright.

a car waits to let us cross & it's lori driving, i had the need to let her know so i yell, trying to disguise my chocked up high pitched wail, 'it's their first day at school!' as i hurry along to not show any tears.

arriving at the school we wait outside, oscar is totally fine but flynn starts getting antsy & wants to be picked up... i daren't, so i look at the teacher & ask if it's better if i leave, she takes one look at me & says yes, so i unwrap flynn's arms from around my neck, turn & go... he starts sobbing loudly & shouts out for me to come back... i sob quietly & keep walking...

but why am i so sad...? i don't want them to stop growing, i really enjoy watching their personalities unfold & the different stages develop... so what is it? am i scared of the passing of time? or just emotionally unstable!! or is it a letting go thing? am i going to have to go through this with every grade?

but to end on a happier note... the other day i was doing up flynn's car seat belt, when i thought a friend of mine drove past so i waved, only to see it wasn't her...

me: oh!

oscar: what mom?

me: i just waved at that car thinking it was someone else...

oscar: that's ok mommy, it was someone else!

kid logic ~ you've got to love it!!