sooooo... i take my 2 year old for his physical. everything is A ok. i was surprised though, no shots ~ but secretly relieved!! i mean seriously i'd rather get 'stuck' 10 times myself than sit gripping my baby so the doctor can prick and make him scream!
i did ask about 3 times though.. no shots?? oh i felt sure there would be shots.. i'm glad he 's not having shots... but what do i know.
a few days later theres a message on my answer machine at home.. it's blah blah blah from the pediatrician's office... your son needs shots, you need to bring him back. oh for the love.....
my son then develops this cough.. trying to not be a neurotic mom i leave it 3 days... it doesn't get any better & he won't use the nebulizer no matter how exciting i make it!! 3 days is my limit.. i then get into panic mode! luckily for me (& my children!!) my pediatrician will always fit us in. so off we went...
i love my pediatrician (it wasn't always that way, but that's a whole other story!!) & i love the staff too. i go to pay my high co-pay & it's with someone i don't know... & quite frankly wasn't warming to... i mean really... who wears false eyelashes to work, unless you're marilyn monroe or an actress... does marilyn fall into that category??
anyway i'm handing over my credit card and mention that someone had left a message on my answer machine saying my son needed shots... she says with a snotty air, no he doesn't, nonchalantly looking at his chart...who left that message? i said i don't know, it wasn't someone i recognized... it could have been you! ouch!!! in a don't be stupid voice... she scoffed, ME???? it absolutely WASN'T me!!! (in unspoken words & gestures....how dare you accuse me). oh ok ~ i say... so he definitely doesn't need shots then?? no, i've already told you... he definitely doesn't need any... so i say, why would some call me then?? she flutters those falsey's at me and exhales 'i have no idea!' - meow pussy cat!!
i sit down in the busy waiting room... watching my kids climb all over the germ infested toys! that once i would have sprayed and cleaned with 'clorox everywhere' before allowing them anywhere near them! i'm thinking... i know i'm sleep deprived, drink too much wine & a bit neurotic but this is my sons health, why on earth would someone leave me a message if my son didn't need shots. i ring my answer machine at home to see if the message is still there... i don't hold out much hope though, i'm very untidy & not well organized. oh here it is...
i have the message ready, walk over to eyelash girl's desk & ask who is jacqueline? without looking up... that's me. oh... have a listen to this & i hit speaker!! color drained from her face... she develops a 'just swallowed a wasp' expression. i have never seen anyone backpedal so badly or got that much pleasure out of it! ah yes you ARE right! FINALLY ~ when am i ever called that!! fan fare...
thank you very much!! GOODNIGHT!!
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